I sat outside this morning with some coffee while the dogs played in the yard and did some drawing and thinking/feeling about the power of fear in my life. Fear is such a manipulative bully who convinces me of things about myself that aren't true and become blind to and I'm starting to get pissed off about it. Fear stopped me from trying things as a kid from different foods to reading books to making art. It told me I was fat, ugly and stupid and shape shifted into an eating disorder for many years. It told me I wasn't good enough on my own and if I was loved by someone else like in the movies, I would feel complete and happy. It has stood in my way of being fully myself in the world, has made me believe that people won't like my quirks, my sass and my sensitivity if I show those parts all of the time. All of that has lead to so much anxiety, insecurity and people pleasing throughout my life and I have slowly been trying to figure it out through books, therapy, podcasts and conversations. But Kelly pointed out last night that it's not as complicated as it feels and we all actually have the tools inside of us already to do whatever the hell we want to in this life but we actually have to DO something about it, not wait for something to magically change, that it's the practice of the thing that will actually make it change. That sounds like something I feel like I already know in theory and would say to someone else who was struggling with this but man, I really needed to hear and feel that. As the Indigo Girls said, "the hardest to learn was the least complicated." How does fear show up and stand in your way? Have you figured out ways to put it in it's place so it doesn't have power over you? Feel free to message me if you want to have a conversation about this and prefer not to comment publicly. Onward, friends.